Friday, March 18, 2005


Many years ago I did a personal actualization course. During the final session of the course, the trainer gave a short blurb on a whole lot of life concepts. In spite of not having any children at the time, I remember what he said about how parents view their children.

He gave the example of a box of matches. He held it up and said, from where we the audience see the box, we see one picture, and from where he views the box, he sees an entirely different picture to ours. Clearly, two very different views of the same box, and no matter where you looked at the box from, it remained the same box of matches.

He went on to ask if any parents in the room had had the experience of arriving to get their kids from school, for example. While sitting in their car, they see their kid playing. The kid is not aware that the parent is watching him or her. Without the awareness of the parent being there, the kid is free to express him/herself without the restriction of what the parent might think, etc., etc. Many parents said they had been through this experience and that they had sat and watched their kid thinking how there are so many aspects to their kids they never see – and what a warm, pleasing and rewarding experience it was to watch their kid freely expressing him or herself and simply being.

I find the contrasts reflected in these two pics really interesting. My stepson, David is 16 years old. He has a natural talent for any sport and has inherited his paternal grandfather’s ability to work with his hands. He has a passion for carpentry and woodwork, and it is amazing what this “kid” can produce from a piece of wood.

Somehow, I wouldn't expect the energy reflected in the wrestling pic to be re-channeled into producing something as intricate - if not delicate in parts - as the workings in this kist; the one he designed and built. ('Kist' is the word used to describe a storage chest in the UK and South Africa.)
I guess one has to be prepared to shift their perspectives and points of view all the time!